To circumcise or not to circumcise?
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This blog is for advice, stories, questions, support etc. that young mothers may have. I myself am a young, 27 year old, mother of two. A 3 1/2 year old girl and a 18 month old baby boy. I know I need help and imagine other mothers do too. I plan on posting questions etc. every few days and I hope that you, the readers, will respond by commenting. Let's help each other out!
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About Me
- Brittany Crane
- Married, mother of three.
Definitely circumcise!
ReplyDeleteI agree with Jill 100- thousand percent!
ReplyDeleteCircumcise, no question.
ReplyDeleteI know people say that there are no advantages to circumcising and that it's pretty much half and half now, but I just think purely for the sake of your son and his self-esteem, your safest bet is to circumcise.
Hi Brittany,
ReplyDeleteWhy would you want to circumcise your child? What are your thoughts on the matter?
I think it really actually depends on the father. If the father is, I think its best if the son is also. Circmsizing is also a lot easier to keep clean. I think its a personal decision, so either way, ultimately what you feel is best for your son is what you'll be happy with in the long run, not pressure or tradition or whatever. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteI am not a regular reader, and I hope that my message will not feel too out of place. I was linked to this post by a good friend. My aim is absolutely not to offend.
ReplyDeleteI am not circumcised, though the other men in my family are, as are many of my friends. Thankfully my parents taught me that I didn't need to conform to happy, and that it is okay to be yourself just as you are. Looking different from my father has never once been a concern of mine. In fact, I am only sort of certain that he is circumcised. We never once compared them. To be honest, that never seemed like a good reason to do it to me.
In an infant, the foreskin is attached to the head of the penis (like a fingernail is attached to the fingernail bed). Until it naturally separates on its own, which takes years, sometimes until puberty, you simply wash the penis like a finger, you don't pull back the skin or anything. simple. Cleaning a circumcision wound is less simple, especially for a new mother... especially because if done improperly, there are a number of complications that can occur.
Once the foreskin becomes retractable, a boy will be able to do it himself. All a parent has to do is tell him to pull it back in the shower to rinse it off with water. After years and years of experience, let me assure you, it is the easiest form of hygiene that exists. If you can teach a child to brush their teeth, trust me, this one is not difficult. You'll be lucky if you can get him to STOP touching his penis in the shower, in all likelihood. So, to be honest, I don't quite get reasoning either. It simply is not hard to keep clean in the first place. Cleaning the labia and clitoral hood seem like a more challenging task to me, but thankfully no one is trying to make that job easier with a surgical procedure.
I don't think there is really a good reason TO circumcise a healthy baby. The American Academy of Pediatrics does not recommend the procedure (nor does the Canadian Pediatric Society, or the Royal Australasian College of Physicians, or virtually any other medical organization on the planet). In fact, many recommend against it.
The foreskin is actually valuable tissue! It is healthy, sensitive, functional and erogenous. It is one of the most sensitive parts of the body, not surprising considering its location. It contains the same type of nerve endings as those found on the fingertips and lips! It serves the role of protection as well, keeping the head of the penis in its natural condition, regulates its temperature, and protects the urethra from harmful bacteria and damage. Meatal stenosis,a scarring of the urethral opening, affects up to 10 percent of circumcised men, but virtually no men with a foreskin. The foreskin also has sexual purpose, as a result of its mobility. This provides functionality to both the man and his partner.
I get that many people see circumcision as a family decision, but I don't see why. It isn't the family's foreskin; it is the individual's foreskin - shouldn't he really get the final say? Personally, I am super grateful that I was given that choice, despite the fact that I live in a culture where many people are completely ignorant about it. Luckily most people are pretty open-minded, and when they realize that the foreskin is a pretty nifty thing to have around, they drop their mixed-up ideas about the foreskin.
You might consider watching a youtube video of the procedure to help you make your choice. It isn't just a little snip! I think it makes sense to not do that to your son if you don't ABSOLUTELY have to, you know?
I have the most respect in the world for mothers, and the incredible hard work they do, and the difficult choices they are forced to make every day. This is one you DON'T have to make, thankfully.
There is no medical reason to circumcise, neither is it a law we follow. I have been in to see a circumcision and it wasn't pretty! That being said, all my boys are circumcised, because their father insisted on it. I must say, I felt terrible for the little guys, though!
ReplyDeleteAs far as being a nurse, though, I thank you in advance if you do choose to circumcise, just in case I have to catheterize the little guy, because it is so much easier to catheterize a circumcised one!! LOL
In the end, it's totally up to how you feel and how your husband feels about the whole thing.
If you choose to circumcise, I would recommend the procedure where they use what is called a plastibell. I have 2 sons, and one has had this, the other did not. It was much easier to monitor and keep clean, as opposed to keeping gauze and petroleum jelly on such a little area (especially when you are CONSTANTLY changing diapers!) You should ask your doctor about this, and find out if your pediatrician will do the procedure (I had to have my OB do it, since my ped. didn't feel comfortable with it.) I have also heard from men who have chosen to be circumcised later in life and they have much preferred it to the former. Ultimately, it's up to you and your spouse- good luck!
ReplyDeleteI say do it. Both my boys slept during the whole procedure. Have their doctor do it the day they are born, that way the nurses are having to take care of it for you the 1st little while, which is the worst of it. (They did that w/ my 1st and then they were going to do my 2nd the day we were leaving and I asked for them to do it the day before, so they did) By the time you take them home then it won't be as sensitive and easier to take care of. It's not really too painful for them as babies and it's not too diffucult to take care of so it heals properly. But, of course it is your and your husband's decision in the end, so good luck!
ReplyDeleteI am an RN and I say definitely do NOT circumcise! It's medically unnecessary and the procedure carries some risk. Although most babies do okay after a circ, sometimes there are problems like bleeding and infection. I also must say, not to argue with the mom who said otherwise, I've *never* seen a circ where the baby slept through the event, even if they were one of the ones who received some local anesthesia. The hygiene issue is also a myth. I didn't circ my son, despite my husband being circed, and I won't circ this little one about to be born.
ReplyDeleteBut..you don't know me and you need to come to a decision YOU feel comfortable with...
My suggestion is to start researching everything about both options now. Search online, but not just from one or two sources (some are very biased - from both sides of the issue). Write out the pros and cons of each, research complications of circ and complications of a foreskin. Look for parents who regret having their child circed and for stories of parents who regret not having their son circed. What are your religious beliefs on this? Jews are the only ones commanded to do it. Christians aren't required, and the New Testament even speaks to this. Look for videos of circs because there are 3 different kinds that are done.
For us, the procedure wasn't worth the risk. Pretty much the worst case scenario was that our son had an ever-so-slight increase of getting a urinary infection but for all boys it's still a much lower chance that a girl would have. So if he did get a uti (he never did), we'd just have the doctor treat with an antibiotic, just like we'd treat it in a daughter.
It's a tough decision but spend some time researching and soul searching and then feel confident in your decision. Good luck!
I just have to say, I agree with the other RN on the fact that I have never seen a baby sleep through the procedure. They are usually screaming their heads off. And they absolutely do feel everything we feel. This is a myth that some still hold over from when they did open heart surgery on babies because they said they didn't feel the same as we do. It's crazy!! I would think the baby might sleep through a circumcision if they still had some of the mom's drugs in their body- yes it does get through to them, despite what they say! This is why it would be beneficial to do it on the same day as birth, but since you have opted out of drugs, you won't have that benefit.
ReplyDeleteI believe my boys did sleep through the procedure b/c it was the day they were born and they were exausted from the delivery and yes they probably did have some of the drugs in their system. I forgot you were opting out of drugs, so that's something to think about too. Oh and yes, they did sleep during the procdure.
ReplyDeletePlease let your son have the choice over the function and appearance of his most private area. Here are some articles I have written:
ReplyDeleteTop 12 Misconceptions about Circumcision and the Intact Male:
http://web.mac.com/jencoias/coiasfamily/12_MYTHS.html
(12 most common myths that you hear from the public.)
Care of the Intact Child:
http://www.drmomma.org/2010/01/basic-care-of-intact-child.html
(In dept description of the normal development of the intact child. No extra care required!)
Phony Phimosis Diagnosis:
http://www.drmomma.org/2010/01/phony-phimosis-diagnosis.html
(This one is appropriate to address all the people who try to convince you that it "might need to be done later in life," another common myth.)
I don't believe infants sleep through the procedure because they feel nothing. It is worth noting that in infants, they can not safely use adequate amounts of anesthetic, because it is unsafe for an infant's system.
ReplyDeleteRather than simply sleeping, many infants will sort of 'shut down' when they are overwhelmed. It is a similar situation to how some infants will sleep for many hours straight after getting a series of shots.
It is worth noting, also, that traumatic events are permanently recorded in the brain, even events that occur at birth.
Ultimately, though, I don't think the issue here is pain. The issue is the removal of a valuable body part.
Wow as you can read with all these comments it is a very hot topic! With Chase as a Med Student i called him to hear his opinion on the matter, and as a few of the other medical people on here have said, he too said there is no reason to do it, and added that if it wasn't needed then it wouldn't be there in the first place. He told me to research it, which i did and me and Brandon decided that in the end... its about sixes in our view...there is not reason to do it, and really no reason to not do it when you weigh in all the pros and cons...so we decided that we would do it because He dad is, and well almost every other male in his life now and most likely ever would be is. Lame finally decision, but it is a hard one to make. Really, i feel your pain on having to decide.
ReplyDeleteAlso someone mentioned the plastibell, defiantly the way to go! Of all the methods i think it is the nicest. and it wasn't hard to take care of...really the hardest part was just waiting for it to fall off..which is does about the same time their cord does.
Also, if you do do it, don't do it when they are one day old. We had to cause we lived out of town, and couldn't come back to get it done when he was a few days old and i did feel REALLY bad about that. They are going through so much those first few days getting settled into this scary world the last thing they need is someone causing them more pain.
Well i wasn't going to make this long, but it is, so i am going to stop now. Good luck, ultimately it is up to you and your hubby!
I dont know why I feel really weird about a lot of the comments on her but I do. lol here is my two cents. I have two boys and both are circed. I also suggest as someone else did the plastibell method. My first was with that and it just seemed to go smoother, clean easier and looked better. My second wasn't done for a few weeks after birth and the non look seriously kinda grosses me out. Maybe it is just what I am use to but I would laugh at the little ant eater everytime I changed his bumb. Really though either way will be totally fine. I dont know a single person who is circed that wishes they weren't however I do know some of the opposite. It is really becoming more common to not so maybe that wouldn't happen now a days.
ReplyDelete"the non look seriously kinda grosses me out. Maybe it is just what I am use to but I would laugh at the little ant eater everytime I changed his bumb."
ReplyDeleteWell, I sure hope people don't legitimately think an attitude like that is a justifiable reason to circumcise a healthy infant.
A foreskin is valuable tissue, and I personally find it so disrespectful to hear people act as though it is okay to remove it from an infant for such trivial motivations.
I really encourage mothers to reconsider this line of thinking...
It is a common misconception that the plasitbell circumcision is somehow more humane. People think that it doesn't involve cutting, but there is still significant amounts of cutting. Also the most painful part of a circumcision is not the actual cutting, it is when the foreskin (which is naturally fused to the penis)is torn off the glans with a blunt probe. This is like ripping your fingernail off, only in the most sensitive area of your body. This must be done no matter what method of circumcision is performed. And as I mentioned there is still cutting with all forms of circumcision. Here is a plastibell circumcision: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5MLtxCwdMv0
ReplyDeleteBut the pain really isn't the big issue. Even if it were painless (which no infant circumcision can be painless) it is still unwarranted, non-therapeutic genital reduction surgery on a minor who can't consent. There is no medical reason to do it and cultural reasons aren't valid enough to alter the genitals of baby girls, so why would boys be any different? I don't know any parents who look identical to their children, least of all their genitals.
I hope you took a look at some of my documents. Best wishes!
There are equal risks to circumcise as there are not to. You'll have to make choices for your children without their consent for many years to come - it's a judgment call, just as it is to name them, feed them, bathe them, etc. Your child could just as easily be upset for not circumcising them as they could be for having done the procedure. Each argument can cancel each other out.
ReplyDeleteIt's a personal decision and to argue one way is "correct" is wrong in my opinion.
@Kelly,
ReplyDeleteThat is simply not true. The risk of having a problem with a foreskin is extremely low. There are absolutely other body parts that are more likely to have problems.
Circumcision ALWAYS removes valuable tissue. That is more than just a risk.
There is no reason why a parent needs to make the decision at all. Name another healthy, valuable body part that you can cut off of a child. Why should it be a parental judgment call?
It is unfair to compare circumcision (unnecessary harm) to choices parents NEED to make, such as naming, feeding and bathing. It is more like trying to justify piercing the genitals of an infant.. only more painful and far more damaging.
The difference is that an adult unhappy about having a foreskin can choose to have it removed. They can be put under and be given adequate pain relief after, unlike a child.
However, an adult unhappy about being circumcised can NEVER get back what was lost.
The difference is HUGE.
Healthy body parts belong only to the person who must live with them their entire life - the person the body parts are attached to. So, in a sense, you are right.. it is a PERSONAL decision... your child's penis is not your penis.
I think if you're honest with yourself about why you want to circumcise, you'll realize that it really is not justifiable.
What is up with this "Joel" guy. He said his opinion and now he needs to back off.
ReplyDeleteSorry. I was just trying to help.
ReplyDeleteLess than 1 in 6000 chance that an intact boy or man will ever need a medical circumcision. This is actually comparable to the number of women who will ever need a circumcision. Improper care of intact boys during childhood, such as trying to retract, can lead scarring of the foreskin, which can cause problems later in life. If you leave your child's penis alone. Clean only the exterior and wipe like a finger from base to tip your son will never have a problem. Retraction can take until after adolescence to occur this is normal. Never let a doctor try to retract your intact son. Care is easy, LEAVE IT ALONE!
ReplyDeletehttp://www.drmomma.org/2010/01/phony-phimosis-diagnosis.html